Secretly, but not so secretly, I'm an introvert.

I may seem outgoing sometimes. I might laugh at everything, make a sarcastic comment, or talk too much. But really, deep down inside, I'm an introvert. Ok, you may be thinking, "Deep down inside? I think you're confusing that with 'outside your comfort zone.'" But no, I just am shy. Always have been. Granted, now I speak up a little bit more, get in someone's face occasionally because "that's not fair", or something like that. But really. I'm just shy. After I speak up, or confront someone, I usually wish I hadn't, because now the attention is on me. I hate when the attention is on me. When I might have done or said something wrong, or because maybe I will do or say something wrong. Or something not necessarily wrong, but different. Weird. I hold such people who immediately categorize someone as "weird" or "normal" in disdain, generally, but the main reason for that is because I'm afraid they will categorize me. I don't want to be weird. I hate being that one person who is not always guaranteed a place in conversation, or a seat next to someone. The person everyone ignores, until they need a favor. I hate being the outsider. Of course, everyone does, so this is not new. But it's hard to make friends, for me. I need them to make the first move. And then if they stick with me, and don't abandon me, and actually take interest in me, I can start to feel safe. This post ended up being different then I thought it would be. I originally was thinking about playing the piano. That's right, and I can sense your eye roll, but just listen. Or read, I guess I should say. I was thinking about playing the piano, and how I don't like playing to silence. I don't like silence. I suppose it comes from living with seven other people. Five of which are younger than I am. So I am used to noise. Not only used to it, but fond of it, actually. Silence is one of the things that scares me the most. Piano recitals, in spite of the fact there is sound issuing from the piano, tend to be horribly silent. It's what makes me the most nervous. I would be much more comfortable if someone was talking. Whispering, even. Or if someone dropped their bag and the contents spilled all over the floor. Actually, that would be embarrassing, but you get my point. Because in that moment, the attention is not all on me. Once you start, and you're playing your song, you can start to forget, and relax a little. The piano has always given me this kind of comfort. And it's not always like that. It's fun, when I'm with friends, showing them a song I really like, and they say how well I can play, but I'm not putting on a grand show for them. And you know, it's not even for them, really. Mostly it's for me. I like showing off something that I've learned and worked hard for to people who care about me, and not necessarily my achievements. My true friends encourage me to work hard and be accomplished, but if I don't, if I fail a test, or made a bunch of mistakes on that song, they don't care. They still love me. Oh gosh, this is a very scatterbrained post, with lots of grammar mistakes I'm too tired to fix, and if you're still reading, I pity you. But I thank you for listening.

Sage

My Summer Reading List

Well, it's getting to be that time of year, when we bookworms start making our lists. Or is that just me? Anyway, I usually have a mental list of what I want to read in the summer, and I also have literally stacks of books waiting for me in various places around my house. This time I shall blog it. I'll have you know this is quite an accomplishment for me. Sooooo here goes.

My summer reading list:

Airborn
Heroes Of The Valley (this one looks really good!)
The Last Dragon (I've already listened to this once before, but it was a long time ago and I really liked it so I will read it again)
A Nest For Celeste
Rodzina
Jackie's Wild Seattle
Breadcrumbs
Drift House: the first voyage
The Shadow Thieves
The Dark Is Rising
The Inheritance Cycle. That's the official name for the Eragon Trilogy, by the way. Just in case you were wondering.

Well, that's a disorganized list. Oh well. I also realize that a few of these (actually most of these) are children's books, but I don't care. I'm going to read them. It's very unlikely that I will read ALL of these, of course, but it's nice to have a list of what's in front of you.
I just finished reading The Thief, by Megan Whalen Turner. It was a great book. It didn't start out seeming so great, but I never saw the end coming. It also resolves itself very well, in my opinion. So well that it just left me with this great love for the characters. I was completely content and happy with the way it ended. You may not think it was such a great book, and I am not always the best judge, but I believe it's worth reading. Read on, my friends!!! Or, as Ramona's teacher would say, D.E.A.R! Which, sadly, but not so sadly, reminds me of DEER!!! Please tell me someone gets this.

Sagerific

P.S.
Have you read any good books lately?

I have no idea how to title this, except I am sick.

Ug. I am sick. I feel like crud. Why??? This is not fun. And it's so pretty outside, but I can hardly enjoy it with this cold! :( Well, at least it was thoughtful enough to wait until after the play to come on. Speaking of which, The Tempest was a great success!! I had lots of fun doing it:) Thank you to all who came and supported us! Or at least supported us, even if you couldn't come:) Now, it is time to finish my school, some crochet projects, and mail that dang present and letter to Marley (sorry!). All while I have a cold. At least I have my red converse and a sweater to cheer me up. Hope you all feel better than I do!

Spring! Hurry up!

I am in desperate need of some spring. And not just spring, I need sun. I want to wear shorts and sandals and t-shirts. Also, I think I need to move away from Washington. It's too gray. Sun gives me energy, and since there's been so little of it, I've been drained. I need some motivation! Anyway, just thought I'd let you know. I also have a surprise coming for you people, but it will not be revealed for at least a week. So keep checking my blog if you want to find out what awesome project I'm working on.

Sagerific

Buy my stuff! :)

So, I have a lot of things that I'm saving money for right now, (such as a trip to Virginia, EFY, a keyboard of my own, an ipod touch:) and I've decided to start selling things I crochet to earn some money. I haven't started yet, so I need some ideas. Would anyone like something specific? And actually, would anyone be willing to buy ANYTHING? I can make cute slouchy beanie hats, little amigurumi polar bears (which could be regular bears with different colors), coin purses, flower clips, pencil cases, etc. I guess I'm self-marketing here. Spread the word that I can make and sell crocheted stuff!!! :) And please, requests. As long as it's not a huge sweater. And remember, this would be really, really helpful!

Sagerific

Wordles

I love wordles. They look super awesome and totally professional. And they're free:) Here are a couple of Shakespeare ones I did. The first one is Much Ado About Nothing, my favorite play:)

http://www.wordle.net/show/wrdl/6274136/Much_Ado_About_Nothing

The second one is The Tempest:

http://www.wordle.net/show/wrdl/6273985/The_Tempest

Anyway I think they're cool and would be a fun idea for a tshirt design.

Want to create your own? Go to http://www.wordle.net/ and click 'create' to try it out!


Sagerific

Happy New Year!!!

I'm back from Christmas vacation. Now, back to schoolwork and seminary. I really miss sleeping in. But, it is all for the good, and I'm starting a new semester in school. For my big class project this term, I have to have a garden. And I have to start very soon, and to start very soon the plants would need to withstand cold weather. So, I'm crossing my fingers and hoping I won't fail this and kill my soon-to-be garden. I will also be helping and working on a new play this year with the Shakespeare class! Presenting.....The Tempest! I'm am very excited to start working on it and I'm sure it's going to be lots of fun. Oh, and I do have one new year's resolution, which is: start reading classics! I haven't read Moby Dick, Les Miserables, Jane Eyre, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, A tale of two cities, ok maybe I should just do authors, Charles dickens, MORE Shakespeare, Jane Austen, L. M. Montgomery, Nathaniel Hawthorne, C. S. Lewis, Louisa May Alcott,............Anyway, that probably will not happen until this summer. When I do start all this, I will hopefully remember to blog and write reviews on these, which will probably be full of spoilers, since I don't like secrets. And if you haven't read the books and you don't like spoilers, I guess you just don't have to read them. What are your resolutions?

Sagerific