School is stressful. Get over it.

Hey people! Haven't posted in a while, have I? No sirree. Well now I will.

So what have you guys been up to? I've been bombarded with school stuff, and I really shouldn't be blogging right now, but it won't take very long, and I need to get my mind off of my stupid, frustrating, exasperating, and totally annoying biology class that I am taking online.

Like seriously. I HATE IT. I'm kind of scatterbrained (read: really, really, scatterbrained) sometimes, or all the time, and so my mind just doesn't do details very well. I like the story part of things. I can't ever remember the dates of things, unless they're really important, and even then, who knows...But biology, it seems to me, is all about details, and so my brain doesn't want to learn about the cells that it's made of.

My Spanish class would work better if the course wasn't so confusing to navigate and complete.

Really, math is the only one I'm doing okay on this year. Yes, you read that right, I said MATH. I still don't like it. It's boring and annoying, but I'm starting to grasp the concepts a little better now. So it's not so bad. But I still don't like it.

I'm also taking a class called UNLEASHING YOUR VOICE (see what I did there? ;)). I like this one. I've learned a lot about speeches, and I think I'm getting better at getting up in front of people. I still get nervous and sometimes feel like I'm going to faint from embarrassment because my thoughts scatter and start running around crazy like escapees from an insane asylum, but it's going away a little bit.

And then finally, there's TJYC. This takes up more of my time than anything else, and it's really hard, but I love it. It's really quite fantastic. I'm learning so much, and reading a book almost every week, and writing essays every other week, and participating in discussions, and studying documents, and education, and statesmen, and it's really one of the most fulfilling classes I've ever taken. My teacher and I haven't always gotten along. She's pushed me  to work hard in the past, and it's always felt like too much. Like I can't do it. Because it's hard to critique Hamlet when you're 13. I didn't think I could do it, and so I pretty much failed. I passed the class, and did pretty well, but I probably didn't do as well as I could have. But in this class, TJYC, I realize that my teacher pushes me to work hard because she wants me to do well, and she knows I can do well. And I finally know I can do it. I can read that book. I can write that essay. And even though it's hard, and I sometimes feel like I'm going to fall apart from all the stress, it's totally worth it, and I love it. Thanks Genne. You're a great teacher, and I appreciate that you believe in me.

Sagerific

I Feel Like A Rain Cloud

Some days are just crappy. And when they are, it's nice to have people who understand that. The rainy gray weather pretty much reflected my mood today. Aside from my mood, today is Adam's birthday! Happy birthday Adam! Even though you won't be reading this. Oh well. I made him an awesome Harry Potter cake. Considering the fact the all I had for decorating was frosting, it was pretty cool. Another ray of sunshine in my rainy day was the 'planning meeting' we had at lunch today for the Shakespeare club I'm trying to get organized. We now have an idea of what we'll be doing each week, what kinds of things we'll be acting out, reading, etc. I still don't know what we'll be performing, or what we'll have accomplished by the end of the year, but it's a good start, and the meeting went about as well as it could have in a room full of loud children eating lunch and yelling and stuff. Maybe my day wasn't a complete waste after all.

School Is Starting!!

YAY!!!! Ok so maybe you don't like school that much, and fine. You probably have good reason for it. But my school is awesome. It really is. I mean, there are times when I hate it and I want to go live in a hole and not ever think about writing anything ever again. I think this year will have a few stressful points, to say the least. But I think it will be a good year. Stressful and overloaded, but good. I didn't realize how much schoolwork I was going to be doing until yesterday. Like, holy crap, where did all this come from?! I'm taking a class called Thomas Jefferson Youth Certification (TJYC), although I think they are changing the name, which has around, oh, 20 hours of schoolwork outside of class. I'm taking a writing lab for that class, I'm taking a personal finance class and a class called Unleashing Your Voice, both with hopefully very little outside work at all, otherwise I might die. I'm also doing Spanish, math, biology, maybe art, and most definitely piano lessons! How's that for ya?

I am freaking out.

Anyway, this blog will either become neglected and pathetic (oh wait, it already is), or it will be my creative outlet. Maybe I can practice some writing skills. Maybe I can learn stuff and share it with you guys! So you can learn about Martin Luther too! How's that sound? Good? 'Kay. Well I have class in an hour and I have yet to eat breakfast and make myself look presentable, so I will leave you. Bye!

Sagerific

Well, that last post was kind of a downer. Lets think of a happier subject. I started reading Divergent today. So far, it's great. I love dystopian novels. They make you think. Also, I have hardly read ANYTHING on my previously mentioned summer reading list. I read The Shadow Thieves. It was good, but similar enough to Percy Jackson, that I couldn't help comparing it, and, of course, Percy Jackson won. Soooo yeah... I started The Last Dragon, but got bored, started Heroes of the Valley, got bored, and have yet to even consider actually reading any of the other ones on the list. Soooo, here's a new and improved one:

Death Comes To Pemberley (doesn't that sound fantastic? It's a murder mystery written as sort of a sequel to Pride and Prejudice!)
The Mermaid Chair
The Pinhoe Egg
Maybe some other Jane Austen books, some classics such as Les Miserables, The Count of Monte Cristo, Moby Dick, The Great Gatsby (confession: mainly this one because of the movie, but also curiosity. It's been on my shelf for a while.), etc.

And this is not summer reading, but I've been waiting for...drum roll......................The House of Hades!!!!!
Warning: Next line contains spoilers so if you don't want those, scroll past.




OhmygoshtherewassuchacliffhangerandPercyandAnnabethwereputinthathorribleplacecalledTartarusandtheymightdieandmostlikelyundergotortureandseparationandwhoknowswhatelsethathorribleauthorRickRiordanhasdreamedupandI'vebeenwaitingforalmostafreakingyear!!!!
Well, not quite that. But it feels like it!!!









Anywho, I hate sticking to lists, so who knows what will happen. And who really cares, anyway?
Oh, guess what? I'm thinking about going on a writing retreat. In Colorado. It sounds amazing, and I think it'll help my writing skills. Not this year though. Next year, maybe. Anyway, what do you think?

Sage

Secretly, but not so secretly, I'm an introvert.

I may seem outgoing sometimes. I might laugh at everything, make a sarcastic comment, or talk too much. But really, deep down inside, I'm an introvert. Ok, you may be thinking, "Deep down inside? I think you're confusing that with 'outside your comfort zone.'" But no, I just am shy. Always have been. Granted, now I speak up a little bit more, get in someone's face occasionally because "that's not fair", or something like that. But really. I'm just shy. After I speak up, or confront someone, I usually wish I hadn't, because now the attention is on me. I hate when the attention is on me. When I might have done or said something wrong, or because maybe I will do or say something wrong. Or something not necessarily wrong, but different. Weird. I hold such people who immediately categorize someone as "weird" or "normal" in disdain, generally, but the main reason for that is because I'm afraid they will categorize me. I don't want to be weird. I hate being that one person who is not always guaranteed a place in conversation, or a seat next to someone. The person everyone ignores, until they need a favor. I hate being the outsider. Of course, everyone does, so this is not new. But it's hard to make friends, for me. I need them to make the first move. And then if they stick with me, and don't abandon me, and actually take interest in me, I can start to feel safe. This post ended up being different then I thought it would be. I originally was thinking about playing the piano. That's right, and I can sense your eye roll, but just listen. Or read, I guess I should say. I was thinking about playing the piano, and how I don't like playing to silence. I don't like silence. I suppose it comes from living with seven other people. Five of which are younger than I am. So I am used to noise. Not only used to it, but fond of it, actually. Silence is one of the things that scares me the most. Piano recitals, in spite of the fact there is sound issuing from the piano, tend to be horribly silent. It's what makes me the most nervous. I would be much more comfortable if someone was talking. Whispering, even. Or if someone dropped their bag and the contents spilled all over the floor. Actually, that would be embarrassing, but you get my point. Because in that moment, the attention is not all on me. Once you start, and you're playing your song, you can start to forget, and relax a little. The piano has always given me this kind of comfort. And it's not always like that. It's fun, when I'm with friends, showing them a song I really like, and they say how well I can play, but I'm not putting on a grand show for them. And you know, it's not even for them, really. Mostly it's for me. I like showing off something that I've learned and worked hard for to people who care about me, and not necessarily my achievements. My true friends encourage me to work hard and be accomplished, but if I don't, if I fail a test, or made a bunch of mistakes on that song, they don't care. They still love me. Oh gosh, this is a very scatterbrained post, with lots of grammar mistakes I'm too tired to fix, and if you're still reading, I pity you. But I thank you for listening.

Sage

My Summer Reading List

Well, it's getting to be that time of year, when we bookworms start making our lists. Or is that just me? Anyway, I usually have a mental list of what I want to read in the summer, and I also have literally stacks of books waiting for me in various places around my house. This time I shall blog it. I'll have you know this is quite an accomplishment for me. Sooooo here goes.

My summer reading list:

Airborn
Heroes Of The Valley (this one looks really good!)
The Last Dragon (I've already listened to this once before, but it was a long time ago and I really liked it so I will read it again)
A Nest For Celeste
Rodzina
Jackie's Wild Seattle
Breadcrumbs
Drift House: the first voyage
The Shadow Thieves
The Dark Is Rising
The Inheritance Cycle. That's the official name for the Eragon Trilogy, by the way. Just in case you were wondering.

Well, that's a disorganized list. Oh well. I also realize that a few of these (actually most of these) are children's books, but I don't care. I'm going to read them. It's very unlikely that I will read ALL of these, of course, but it's nice to have a list of what's in front of you.
I just finished reading The Thief, by Megan Whalen Turner. It was a great book. It didn't start out seeming so great, but I never saw the end coming. It also resolves itself very well, in my opinion. So well that it just left me with this great love for the characters. I was completely content and happy with the way it ended. You may not think it was such a great book, and I am not always the best judge, but I believe it's worth reading. Read on, my friends!!! Or, as Ramona's teacher would say, D.E.A.R! Which, sadly, but not so sadly, reminds me of DEER!!! Please tell me someone gets this.

Sagerific

P.S.
Have you read any good books lately?

I have no idea how to title this, except I am sick.

Ug. I am sick. I feel like crud. Why??? This is not fun. And it's so pretty outside, but I can hardly enjoy it with this cold! :( Well, at least it was thoughtful enough to wait until after the play to come on. Speaking of which, The Tempest was a great success!! I had lots of fun doing it:) Thank you to all who came and supported us! Or at least supported us, even if you couldn't come:) Now, it is time to finish my school, some crochet projects, and mail that dang present and letter to Marley (sorry!). All while I have a cold. At least I have my red converse and a sweater to cheer me up. Hope you all feel better than I do!